i need wife essay

• Humanities ›
• History & Culture ›
• Women's History ›
• Feminist Texts ›

Judy Brady's Legendary Feminist Satire, "I Want a Wife"

George Marks / Getty Images 

• Feminist Texts
• History Of Feminism
• Important Figures
• Women's Suffrage
• Women & War
• Laws & Womens Rights
• American History
• African American History
• African History
• Ancient History and Culture
• Asian History
• European History
• Latin American History
• Medieval & Renaissance History
• Military History
• The 20th Century
• J.D., Hofstra University
• B.A., English and Print Journalism, University of Southern California

One of the best-remembered pieces from the premiere issue of Ms . magazine is “I Want a Wife.” Judy Brady’s (then Judy Syfers) tongue-in-cheek essay explained in one page what all too many men had taken for granted about “housewives.”

What Does a Wife Do?

“I Want a Wife” was a humorous piece that also made a serious point: Women who played the role of “wife” did many helpful things for husbands and usually children without anyone realizing. Even less, it wasn't acknowledged that these “wife’s tasks” could have been done by someone who wasn’t a wife, such as a man.

“I want a wife who will take care of my physical needs. I want a wife who will keep my house clean. A wife who will pick up after my children, a wife who will pick up after me."

The desired wife tasks included:

• Work to support us so I can go back to school
• Take care of the children, including feeding them and nurturing them, keeping them clean, taking care of their clothes, taking care of their schooling and social life
• Keep track of doctor and dentist appointments
• Keep my house clean and pick up after me
• See to it that my personal things are where I can find them when I need them
• Take care of the babysitting arrangements
• Be sensitive to my sexual needs
• But do not demand attention when I am not in the mood
• Do not bother me with complaints about a wife’s duties

The essay fleshed out these duties and listed others. The point, of course, was that housewives were expected to do all these things, but no one ever expected a man to be capable of these tasks. The underlying question of the essay was “Why?”

Striking Satire

At the time, “I Want a Wife” had the humorous effect of surprising the reader because a woman was the one asking for a wife. Decades before gay marriage became a commonly discussed subject, there was only one person who had a wife: a privileged male husband. But, as the essay famously concluded, “who wouldn’t want a wife?”

Judy Brady was inspired to write her famous piece at a feminist consciousness-raising session . She was complaining about the issue when someone said, “Why don’t you write about it?” She went home and did so, completing the essay within a few hours.

Before it was printed in Ms ., “I Want a Wife” was first delivered aloud in San Francisco on Aug 26, 1970. Judy (Syfers) Brady read the piece at a rally celebrating the 50 th anniversary of women’s right to vote in the U.S. , obtained in 1920. The rally packed a huge crowd into Union Square; hecklers stood near the stage as "I Want a Wife" was read.

Lasting Fame

Since “I Want a Wife” appeared in Ms ., the essay has become legendary in feminist circles. In 1990, Ms . reprinted the piece. It is still read and discussed in women’s studies classes and mentioned in blogs and news media. It is often used as an example of satire and humor in the feminist movement .

Judy Brady later became involved in other social justice causes, crediting her time in the feminist movement with being foundational for her later work.

Echoes of the Past: The Supportive Role of Wives

Judy Brady does not mention knowing an essay by Anna Garlin Spencer from much earlier in the 20th century, and may not have known it, but this echo from the so-called first wave of feminism shows that the ideas in "I Want a Wife" were in the minds of other women, too, 

In "The Drama of the Woman Genius" (collected in Woman's Share in Social Culture ), Spencer addresses women's chances for achievement the supportive role that wives had played for many famous men, and how many famous women, including Harriet Beecher Stowe , had the responsibility for childcare and housekeeping as well as writing or other work. Spencer writes, “A successful woman preacher was once asked what special obstacles have you met as a woman in the ministry? Not one, she answered, except the lack of a minister's wife.”

Edited and with additional content by  Jone Johnson Lewis

• Articles in the First Issue of Ms. Magazine
• Is the Wife of Bath a Feminist Character?
• Geoffrey Chaucer: Early Feminist?
• 42 Must-Read Feminist Female Authors
• Review of Zami: a New Spelling of My Name
• Top 10 Books About Ecofeminism
• Ms. Magazine
• Feminist Utopia/Dystopia
• What Was the Main Goal of Mary Wollstonecraft's Advocacy?
• Biography of Valerie Solanas, Radical Feminist Author
• What Is the Problem That Has No Name?
• What Is the Truth Behind Anna Leonowens' Story?
• We Now Demand Our Right to Vote (1848)
• The Woman's Bible and Elizabeth Cady Stanton on Genesis
• Women in Indigenous Captivity Narratives
• Phillis Wheatley's Poems

clock This article was published more than  4 years ago

‘Why I Want a Wife’: The overwhelmed working mom who pined for a wife 50 years ago

A half-century ago, thousands of women’s liberation movement supporters packed into San Francisco’s Union Square. They joined about 100,000 more in cities across the country on Aug. 26, 1970, celebrating the 50th anniversary of women’s suffrage in a protest called the Women’s Strike for Equality . It was in that public space, during the first major demonstration of the modern women’s movement, that the world first heard activist Judy Brady Syfers publicly long for a wife.

“I want a wife who takes care of the children when they are sick, a wife who arranges to be around when the children need special care,” the housewife from San Francisco read into the microphone, her hands shaking during her first time ever speaking in front of a crowd.

“I want a wife who will take care of my physical needs. I want a wife who will keep my house clean. A wife who will pick up after me,” she stated, appealing to all housewives around the country whose husbands took them for granted.

“I want a wife who takes care of the children when they are sick, a wife who arranges to be around when the children need special care, because, of course, I cannot miss classes at school,” said Brady Syfers, who was married to a professor at nearby San Francisco State.

“I was terrified,” Brady Syfers recalled in a 2007 NPR radio interview. “There were lots of hecklers — up near the stage I can remember hearing them as I read, which only egged me on.”

When she finished her list of sometimes sarcastic, sometimes funny, but very realistic demands, the crowd of women roared as they recognized themselves in her words. The short satire was mentioned in television, radio and newspaper reports about the demonstration across the country, she said in a 2005 taped interview with her daughter, Maia Syfers.

A mother's letter, a son's choice and the incredible moment women won the right to vote

After that exhilarating moment, the essay went on to define the women’s movement of the 1970s. It resurfaces often as a feminist classic — a treatise about an imbalance between the sexes that still resonates today as the country marks the 100th anniversary of suffrage.

Earlier this year, as parents struggled to home-school their children during the pandemic, the New York Times commissioned a poll by Morning Consult on the division of labor between couples. Nearly half of fathers with children younger than 12 said they were devoting more time to educating their kids than their spouses, but just 3 percent of women agreed with that assessment.

Fifty years ago, “Why I Want a Wife” started simply as a housewife’s complaints about the lack of recognition for women’s work.

In 1968, Brady Syfers was a faculty wife with two small children. The end of that year her husband got involved with a strike at his university, San Francisco State, that called for creating a Black and ethnic studies department at the majority White school.

Brady Syfers opened up her house as a fundraising headquarters for the strike . Week after week, she organized, fed and worked with the student and faculty strikers, from 7 in the morning until late into the night. For the first time in her life, Brady Syfers was politically active, and she loved it.

“It was exhilarating to be involved in something outside the four walls of my home,” she said in the NPR interview.

When the strike ended five months later — the longest student-led strike in U.S. higher education history — the Black Student Union had a meeting celebrating its win and to thank participants who worked on the strike. Her husband, James Syfers, was given a note of special thanks for raising money. But Brady Syfers was never mentioned.

Feeling angry and unappreciated, “I decided it was time for me to look for the women’s movement,” she said in the 2005 interview.

She found a nearby women’s consciousness-raising group at San Francisco’s Glide Memorial Church, where she met Pam Allen, now known as Chude Allen.

“When I first met Judy, she described herself as a disenfranchised and fired housewife,” Allen said in a phone interview. “She was angry.”

The more Brady Syfers began examining her role in society, the angrier she became. It wasn’t just being overlooked during the student strike. She had faced sexism her whole life.

During college at the University of Iowa, she studied painting and was quite talented, according to Maia Syfers. That’s where she met James Syfers, her future husband. After earning a BFA, she wanted to pursue a master’s degree. To do so, she had to go before a committee who would recommend her to further her studies. At the meeting, the all-male committee told her that she had the talent but that there wasn’t much purpose in going for a master’s — because no university would hire a woman.

She was devastated, her daughter said.

In consciousness-raising meetings at Glide, Brady Syfers began to describe what Betty Friedan’s pioneering book, “ The Feminine Mystique ,” called “the problem that has no name.”

“I was an isolated housewife who had never worked outside the house, and I was badly depressed, miserable and confused about it,” Brady Syfers said in 2007. “I had no idea why I was so depressed.”

Except for “The Feminine Mystique,” Brady Syfers said there was no language in the late 1960s to talk about female unhappiness.

“If you wanted to know anything about women, you went to the Ladies’ Home Journal. That’s all there was,” she said in 2007.

She explained that nothing was written for, by and about women’s collective experience — their history, their psychology, their daily lives. In 1969, the three-year-old National Organization for Women was still considered a small group, Brady Syfers said in 2005.

The bra-burning feminist trope started at Miss America. Except, that’s not what really happened.

The women’s movement of the early 1970s “was an outgrowth of the civil rights movement,” she said. “But it was very much kind of sub rosa. And of course, it was treated scathingly by men and the media.”

Consciousness-raising groups were mocked by men, but Brady Syfers said the sessions were defiant political acts.

Women around the country were pooling personal experiences to create a social, historical analysis of women’s condition. It was a revolution in thinking, she said. Soon a whole women’s press movement publishing feminist pamphlets and underground newspapers exploded around the country, led by the radical Redstockings group in New York.

It was at a consciousness-raising group that Brady Syfers began listing her grievances about the strains of being a housewife. As she talked, the list grew longer and longer until finally someone in the group challenged her to write it down.

So she went home and started writing. Two hours later, she had finished “Why I Want a Wife.” She presented it at the next group meeting, and members applauded. Brady Syfers was thrilled with the response.

“Why I Want a Wife” was first published in a Bay-area feminist underground newspaper called “Tooth and Nail,” according to Allen. The essay began being reprinted in other feminist underground presses across the country during 1970 and 1971.

Meanwhile, in New York activist Gloria Steinem and a group of feminists including Letty Cotton Pogrebin began collecting stories to include in a national magazine to unite and give voice to women’s liberation followers across the nation. In December 1971, the inaugural issue of Ms. Magazine appeared as an insert in New York magazine. That issue included “Why I Want a Wife.”

“We reprinted it so more readers could have the laughter and wisdom that comes from reversing unequal roles,” Steinem wrote in an email.

“I wish it weren’t still relevant but even though many marriages have become more equal, Judy’s words live on,” Steinem said.

“It had a seismic impact,” Pogrebin said in a phone interview. “It didn’t exaggerate what sex roles were all about. Women were expected to do it all.”

Pogrebin pointed out that the theme of “Why I Want a Wife,” which was changed to “I Want a Wife” in Ms., matched the cover of the inaugural issue, which showed a multi-handed Hindu goddess as a housewife juggling more tasks than were humanly possible.

After its publication in Ms., “Why I Want a Wife” became known around the world. “My mother always kind of joked a little bit about ‘Why I Want a Wife,’ because it became so popular,” Syfers said. “It’s paid royalties every year since it was published in Ms. and hundreds of books.”

Brady Syfers ended up getting a divorce years later and reverted to her original name, Judy Brady. She remained an activist in San Francisco the rest of her life, fighting for the rights of women, the disabled and breast cancer survivors. In May 2017, she died at age 80 and a memorial service at the Women’s Building in San Francisco celebrated her life of activism, Maia Syfers said.

“She was proud of ‘Why I Want a Wife,” but I think she was surprised at how iconic it became. She said it came right from her gut.”

Read more Retropolis:

She coined the term ‘glass ceiling.’ She fears it will outlive her.

She said her boss raped her in a bank vault. Her sexual harassment case would make legal history.

She was attacked 50 years ago for being a woman in the Boston Marathon. Then she ran it again at 70.

• Science & Math
• Sociology & Philosophy
• Law & Politics

Rhetoric Analysis “I Want a Wife” by Judy Brady

• Rhetoric Analysis “I Want a…

Judy Brady’s essay  I Want a Wife  generally applies several anecdotes to explore the demands of being a wife and gender roles and expectations. Speaking from her own experience, Brady is bitter about how demanding being a wife is and how the same demands are not expected of men. Overall, Brady’s concern is that the imbalance between gender roles and exaggerated expectations leaves women disadvantaged, hence emphasizing gender inequality within families and in society.

Brady applies satire to address the burdens of being a wife and make her argument compelling to evoke engagement in the audience. Besides, the author’s style and article’s structure combine ethos, pathos, and logos to address the overall theme of female suppression in society. Therefore, the author successfully appeals to the readers’ emotions, reason, and values, which garners sympathy for the author and women, especially when gender equality, women empowerment or suffrage, and the civil rights movement were a priority for society.

The author appeals to pathos to persuade the reader by purposely evoking sympathy and making them feel what the author feels about women being overburdened. Brady uses personal experience and a satirical tone to discuss the exaggerated expectations society expects from wives. The author’s concern is motivated by how easy it is for men to move into new marriages because they do not bear the same burdens and responsibilities as women.

Brady writes, “Not too long ago a male friend of mine appeared on the scene fresh from a recent divorce. He had one child, who is, of course, with his ex-wife. He is looking for another wife” (Brady). The male friend’s situation makes Brady realize that men expect so much from wives as the family’s support system, who have to take care of children, address familial needs, manage the household, and support the husband to achieve his dreams. The societal expectation of a wife to multitask and be indispensable to the man and the family is the source of Brady’s frustration, inviting the audience to see things from her point of view by appealing to pathos throughout the essay. 

Brady also appeals to logic by appealing to the reader’s sense of reason particularly by providing facts. The examples the author provides are suitable for the overall argument and fit perfectly in the 1970s when the article was written. Men and society have various perspectives on the roles and responsibilities of wives even if the expectations suppress women more than men. Brady argues that marriage transforms men and women differently and the transformation disfavors the latter more. Women must take care of household duties, seek opinions from their husbands, fulfill all needs, be available and supportive, and be responsible wives.

The 1970s saw much of the women’s rights movement’s efforts and marches focus on pushing for gender equality in universities and workplaces. Feminists specifically sought more hospitable spaces for women and created more policies to create equal opportunities and ban sexual harassment.  I Want a Wife  contributed to the women’s suffrage protests in this period, although on a different front. The author’s realistic demands resonated with many women and defined the women’s movement as a feminist classic that highlighted gender imbalance, a problem that persists today.

Furthermore, the author appeals to credibility by tapping into the readers’ ideologies and values, especially dignity for all, feminism, and equality. Brady explores the various roles in different sectors in the essay but maintains the words “I want a wife” for each to highlight the sarcasm and humor to maintain the essay’s overall objective to sensitize the audience about female suppression. In the introduction, Brady uses her personal experience to get the audience to understand her general argument and to make her feelings about the issue known. In paragraph one Brady lists the maternal roles of a wife, including being an excellent nurturant, organizing the children’s social life, and addressing the children’s health needs, among others.

The second paragraph addresses the wife’s domestic roles, like cleaning the house, keeping clothes clean, ironing grocery shopping, and relieving her husband’s stress and pain. The third paragraph explores the wife’s mechanical responsibilities, where she has to understand and explain her husband’s difficulties and type papers the husband writes. In paragraph 4, Brady explains the social roles and expectations, including playing hostess to her husband’s friends, meeting the man’s acquaintances, and not interrupting conversations.

The sixth paragraph explores the wife’s sexual responsibilities, such as sexually satisfying the man, birth control, and remaining faithful. Lastly, Brady discusses the woman’s disposable or replaceable role in case the husband wants a new partner, including raising the children independently (Brady). The structure allows Brady to explore women as unequal partners in marriage and contribute extensively to the female suppression theme. 

In conclusion, Brady combines personal experience, logic, and values to discuss a prevalent societal issue in I Want a Wife. Throughout history, society has laid out gender roles and expectations that favor men and suppress women. I Want a Wife is among feminists and women’s suffrage efforts to achieve gender equality and female empowerment. The essay, therefore, achieves the author’s overall objective of enlightening the audience about female suppression within the marriage scope and persuading them to see from her point of view to incentivize sympathy.

Brady, Judy. “Why I want a wife.”  75 Readings: An Anthology  (1972): 325-327.

Related Posts

• Kay Boyle’s The Astronomer's Wife: Analysis
• Shakespeare’s Macbeth: History & Analysis
• Amendment #14: Analysis
• My last Duchess: Analysis
• Beowulf: Summary & Analysis

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.

Post comment

Why I Want a Wife Rhetorical Essay

In the article “I need a wife”, Judy Brady employs impersonation to present her main themes. She pauses as a male speaker and elaborates the societal expectations of being a wife. She highlights the various challenges faced by women in their marital relations.

As a wife and a mother, she uses her finer understanding of feminine obligations and extra responsibilities to continually point out cases of domestic gender bias and how they weigh down on women throughout the article. She reveals how wives are denied basic their privileges and left with the sole responsibility of managing their families. They are also expected to make sacrifices for their husbands simply because they are women and married (Brady, 1971).

The persona yearns for a wife because his divorced friend no longer bears the burden of bringing up children, especially after divorcing the wife since his only child is with the ex-wife. It is clear that the whole responsibility of taking care of the children and their upkeep is considered the wife’s work. The author further expounds on this when he enumerates some of the tasks that he will relinquish once married such as; taking care of the children’s medical care, attending to the children’s school needs, hygiene care and entertainment.

The author captures the reader’s attention when the persona expects to go back to school at the wife’s financial expense and calls this a small cut on the wife’s pay. After finishing his education, the persona expects financial independence with which he does not plan to support the same wife, but other dependents yet it is the wife’s money that paid his fees.

The persona cannot afford to miss class taking care of the children the wife is the one supposed to attend to the children. Here, wives are depicted as objects used by men to attain financial and social freedom (Brady, 1971).

The persona also wants a wife for a homestead manager and a sex object. This is evident on page 2 “A wife to keep the house tidy, attend to his visitors and not to necessarily accompany the husband out but rather remain in her area of jurisdiction”. This beats the major reason for marriage, which is companionship.

Therefore, a wife should allow the husband to be promiscuous while remaining faithful to the husband. This is a perfect definition of a house manager and is unacceptable since two married individuals should be partners. The persona wants a wife to be an object to meet personal sexual needs whenever the need arises, regardless of the wife’s opinion and moreover, she is expected to do it satisfactorily. These aside, it is also upon the wife to take birth control measures since the persona does not need more children (Brady, 1971).

Hence, in this case, the wise is viewed as a sex toy to be used at will and to take care of anything that results from the same engagement. The persona is free to mingle with other people while his wife is confined in the house to uphold monogamy and faithfulness to the husband. The author tries to explore how women are deprived of their own social freedom and made to be mere objects of pleasure, when in real sense they should be equal partners in the matrimonial union.

The author draws the attention of the reader through the words of the persona towards the end of the article. After explaining the reasons why he needs a wife, the persona wishes what the current wife would never like to hear, that is, the persona wants to replace the current wife with one bearing the above stated qualities because, just like the friend aforementioned, the current wife will take the children along with her.

The persona is not even willing to hear the wife’s opinion but is ready to replace her. This will give the persona a chance to make a new start in life with the new wife. A wife is expected to give up her job since the persona is now working. According to the persona, it is the wife’s responsibility to take care of children’s upkeep in case of a divorce thus a means of evading responsibilities.

Thus, women are expected to be submissive to their husbands and to always take up orders without compromising or whatsoever. Hence, the survival, sustenance and continuation of the marriage wholly lie on the husband’s mercy (Brady, 1971).

Judy Brady directly targets a society full of male dominance and has little regard for wives. The persona addresses an audience full of conservatives and people obsessed with male chauvinism and ego as justified by the persona’s friend. Consequently, this awakens the urge in the persona to try and be free from family responsibilities.

In the current generation, the article would be received with lots of mixed reaction, a large section being against the wishes of the article’s persona. For instance, no wife in the current society will be submissive to the standard required by the persona in the article. Marriage is considered a matrimonial union comprised of equal partners who equally contribute to sustain the same union. It will not go down well with most people that the man should be there to take the supervisor’s role, drafting tasks to be undertaken by the wife (Brady, 1971).

A society where each person is entitled to individual freedom, no wife will accept to be confined in the house and cater for children’s needs alone, finance the husband’s education and later give up her professional appointment just because the husband dictates.

In our society today, people may divorce due to misunderstandings and other marital issues but not because one spouse feels like changing to another partner. Generally, the persona’s wishes cannot become reality in today’s society and the qualities of a wife as given in the article may virtually not exist (Brady, 1971).

In summary, the author talks of the plight of women during the period when they were lowly regarded in society. Through the male narrator, the author implies that marriage was solely a man’s concern since it was centered towards men’s self-actualization, financial freedom as well as sexual satisfaction. Thus, a wife is not expected to take up anything else besides children’s welfare and the husband’s comfort. Wives are expected to submit and comply with the demands of their husbands.

The article points out the transition and the struggle for women empowerment ever since it began from a period where wives were purely viewed as house managers and could be changed at the husband’s will, to a modern society where both husband and wife operate in a mutual relationship that values equality. Thus, it is a good article that would help in the quest to establish equitability in marriages and foster mutual interdependence between husband and wife.

Brady, J. (1971). Why I Want a Wife . Web.

• The Contrasting Characters of Ned and Jimmy
• Feminism in The Yellow Wallpaper
• Gender Roles in Brady's and Theroux's Works
• Brady Act Homicide and Suicide Associated Rates
• The Brady Handgun Violence Prevention Act
• The Color of Water by James McBride
• Democracy in America: Critical Summary
• Reflection of the Turse chapter
• Why would they act the way they act?
• Sigmund Freud's "The Uncanny"
• Chicago (A-D)
• Chicago (N-B)

IvyPanda. (2018, December 19). Why I Want a Wife. https://ivypanda.com/essays/why-i-want-a-wife/

"Why I Want a Wife." IvyPanda , 19 Dec. 2018, ivypanda.com/essays/why-i-want-a-wife/.

IvyPanda . (2018) 'Why I Want a Wife'. 19 December.

IvyPanda . 2018. "Why I Want a Wife." December 19, 2018. https://ivypanda.com/essays/why-i-want-a-wife/.

1. IvyPanda . "Why I Want a Wife." December 19, 2018. https://ivypanda.com/essays/why-i-want-a-wife/.

Bibliography

IvyPanda . "Why I Want a Wife." December 19, 2018. https://ivypanda.com/essays/why-i-want-a-wife/.

• To find inspiration for your paper and overcome writer’s block
• As a source of information (ensure proper referencing)
• As a template for you assignment

IvyPanda uses cookies and similar technologies to enhance your experience, enabling functionalities such as:

• Basic site functions
• Ensuring secure, safe transactions
• Secure account login
• Remembering account, browser, and regional preferences
• Remembering privacy and security settings
• Analyzing site traffic and usage
• Personalized search, content, and recommendations
• Displaying relevant, targeted ads on and off IvyPanda

Please refer to IvyPanda's Cookies Policy and Privacy Policy for detailed information.

Certain technologies we use are essential for critical functions such as security and site integrity, account authentication, security and privacy preferences, internal site usage and maintenance data, and ensuring the site operates correctly for browsing and transactions.

Cookies and similar technologies are used to enhance your experience by:

• Remembering general and regional preferences
• Personalizing content, search, recommendations, and offers

Some functions, such as personalized recommendations, account preferences, or localization, may not work correctly without these technologies. For more details, please refer to IvyPanda's Cookies Policy .

To enable personalized advertising (such as interest-based ads), we may share your data with our marketing and advertising partners using cookies and other technologies. These partners may have their own information collected about you. Turning off the personalized advertising setting won't stop you from seeing IvyPanda ads, but it may make the ads you see less relevant or more repetitive.

Personalized advertising may be considered a "sale" or "sharing" of the information under California and other state privacy laws, and you may have the right to opt out. Turning off personalized advertising allows you to exercise your right to opt out. Learn more in IvyPanda's Cookies Policy and Privacy Policy .

I Want a Wife, The Wife Drought – 1970s feminism still rings true

PhD candidate, UNSW Sydney

Disclosure statement

Isobelle Barrett Meyering does not work for, consult, own shares in or receive funding from any company or organisation that would benefit from this article, and has disclosed no relevant affiliations beyond their academic appointment.

UNSW Sydney provides funding as a member of The Conversation AU.

View all partners

Three years ago Annabel Crabb argued on ABC’s The Drum that a lack of wives is what really holds back women in the Australian workforce. She jokingly suggested that what was needed was a “wife quota”.

When my partner sent me a link to her column, I was more than pleased. Was he volunteering to be one of those men who would help fill the shortage? As a historian of 1970s feminism, I was also somewhat bemused.

Crabb’s article reminded me of a classic work of the American women’s movement written more than 40 years ago.

Judy Syfers’ short essay, I Want a Wife , was based on a speech Syfers (now Brady) delivered on August 26 1970 at a rally in San Francisco to mark the 50th anniversary of American women’s suffrage.

Syfers was a housewife, mother of two and recent recruit to the Californian women’s movement. Her essay began with a moment of revelation:

Not too long ago a male friend of mine appeared on the scene fresh from a recent divorce.

Conveniently, his child was now living with his ex-wife and, free of parental obligations, he was on the lookout for a new wife. And so came Syfers’ moment of recognition:

As I thought about him while I was ironing one evening, it suddenly occurred to me that I, too, would like to have a wife.

Syfers’ essay became an instant feminist classic. It was reproduced in Notes from the Third Year (1971), an important anthology of feminist works edited by New York activists Anne Koedt and Shulamith Firestone.

It also featured in the preview issue of the popular feminist magazine, Ms., which sold out in eight days after it was released on 20 December 1971.

And 40 years later, here was Crabb making much the same point. Since then, Crabb has gone on to write The Wife Drought , released in late September. Filled with personal anecdotes of juggling three kids and a career many would envy, the book is witty, heartfelt and informed by the latest research.

With her common touch and broad appeal, Crabb has made a timely contribution to the work-life debate.

But when I finally sat down to read The Wife Drought last week I was not so much bemused as bewildered to discover that it too contained not a single reference to I Want a Wife. Most reviewers of the book likewise seemed oblivious to the connection.

Only feminist stalwart Wendy McCarthy, one of the founding members of the New South Wales branch of the Women’s Electoral Lobby (WEL) in 1972, seemed to know about Syfers’ article. Reviewing The Wife Drought for Anne Summers Reports, she reminisced over reading I Want a Wife for the first time.

Of all the articles in the original edition of Ms., it was “the piece that spoke to me”, McCarthy explained.

I was pregnant with my third child and working out the logistics of being wife, mother, teacher and community activist. Dear God, I needed a wife.

Writing in October this year, McCarthy found Crabb’s book “as loveable” as Syfers’ article, if “eerily scary that so little and yet so much has changed”.

If, like me, she was slightly perturbed that Syfers’ article seems to have been forgotten, she didn’t say so. To set the record straight, this is what Syfers had to say in 1971.

Like Crabb, Syfers set out to expose the taken for granted status of women’s work in the home. She set her sights not only on the invisibility of housework and childcare, but on the emotional and sexual labour of wives. Written in the early years of women’s liberation, the article was more scathing in its tone than The Wife Drought.

Husbands, it implied, were selfish, lazy and ungrateful. They were self-absorbed and altogether uninterested in their own children. To take just a few examples:

I want a wife who will take care of my physical needs. I want a wife who will keep my house clean. A wife who will pick up after my children, a wife who will pick up after me … I want a wife who will take care of the details of my social life … When I meet people at school that I like and want to entertain, I want a wife who will have the house clean, will prepare a special meal, serve it to me and my friends, and not interrupt when I talk about things that interest me and my friends … I want a wife who is sensitive to my sexual needs, a wife who makes love passionately and eagerly when I feel like it, a wife who makes sure that I am satisfied. And, of course, I want a wife who will not demand sexual attention when I am not in the mood for it …

The list of demands was relentless.

And the final punch line?

Wives, Syfers warned, were replaceable.

If, by chance, I find another person more suitable as a wife than the wife I already have, I want the liberty to replace my present wife with another one.

I Want a Wife was a cutting piece of satire and the depiction of men was far from flattering.

Perhaps I shouldn’t be surprised that Syfers’ piece has been since overlooked. The failure to make a connection between Syfers’ article and Crabb’s The Wife Drought is symptomatic of a wider pattern in popular debate about feminism.

It reflects a tendency to forget past feminisms or, worse, misrepresent them – what historian Natasha Campo describes as the process of “re-remembering” feminism.

Tracing Australian media views of feminism from 1980 onwards, Campo has shown how key tenets of 1970s feminism have been misconstrued.

Feminists were blamed for telling women that they could “have it all” – a claim, as Campo points out, that was more a product of British journalist Shirley Conran’s bestseller Superwoman (1975) than of the organised women’s movement.

Ideas such as equal parenting, which had long been espoused by feminists, came to be presented as “new” solutions.

To her credit, Crabb is much more fair-minded in her treatment of past feminisms. For the most part, she refrains from blaming previous generations for the challenges now faced by women who seek to combine work and family. She also brings a historical sensibility to her work, examining past obstacles to gender equality such as the marriage bar in the public service, which remained in place federally until 1966.

Nonetheless, there is a missed opportunity here to link current dilemmas with those illuminated by feminists like Syfers in the 1970s. The parallel between Crabb’s The Wife Drought and Syfers’ I Want a Wife is a poignant reminder that the insights of 1970s feminism still have much to offer those concerned about gender inequality.

Some ideas may now be outdated and some may be outlandish. But many, like Syfers’ I Want a Wife, continue to ring true today.

Who knows what other feminist ideas might be overdue for a comeback?

• Annabel Crabb

Equine Veterinary Nurse

Commissioning Editor Nigeria

Professor in Physiotherapy

Postdoctoral Research Associate

Editorial Internship

I Want a Wife Judy Brady Analysis

This essay will analyze Judy Brady’s essay “I Want a Wife,” which highlights the expectations placed on wives and the gender roles prevalent in society. It will discuss the essay’s use of irony and its effectiveness in critiquing societal norms. The piece will also explore the historical context of the essay and its relevance to contemporary discussions on gender equality and feminism. You can also find more related free essay samples at PapersOwl about Child.

How it works

This “I Want A Wife” by Judy Brady analysis will seek to dissect the author’s meaning, opinion, and true purpose by looking at the meaning, purpose and audience, method and structure, and language present throughout the piece.

• 2 Purpose and Audience
• 3 Method and Structure
• According to Brady, the definition of a wife is a woman who supports her spouse physically and emotionally and takes care of the children and household. A woman who lives to care for her husband and her children.

The wife also displays behaviors that are expected of her; for example, when the spouse decides to bring people that he likes from school to his house, the house must be impeccable. The wife also must cook for his guests and serve them. When they are invited to go somewhere, the wife must figure out the babysitting arrangements. The wife is also expected to take care of the children and the spouse’s physical needs, for example, consistently keeping the house clean and his clothes perfectly “ironed, mended, and replaced when needed.” She also must know how to cook and cook well, and while he is studying, she plans a menu, then she needs to prepare the meal and clean up after her children and her husband. Another activity the wife is responsible for is when the spouse wants to take a family vacation; she shall continue to care for and pamper him the way she does at home. He also wants his wife to never complain about her wifely duties and to always listen to him. Meaning that she cannot give her opinion about her wifely duties because they are her responsibility.

• On the other hand, the spouse’s only responsibility is to go to school and study. The wife takes care of everything else. He would not even write his own papers because he wants his wife to do that. He wants to be able to go to school and not have to worry about anything at home because his wife physically, emotionally, and financially supports him.
• Based on the context of Brady’s essay, “nurturant” means that the wife is very loving and affectionate with her children, that she always took the best care of them. Hors d’oeuvres are served before the entrée, in the form of an appetizer, with anything you would like, such as cheese and crackers. The husband wanted the wife to prepare this and be attentive to their guests, always have an ashtray, make sure their wine glasses are never empty, and most importantly, ensure that they feel comfortable.

Purpose and Audience

• The reasoning behind Brady writing this essay was not to explain a wife’s duties, nor complain about her situation, or attack men and society for having this attitude towards women. It is to show to her audience that the responsibilities the wife has and the particular way she must behave is not right, and the way society sees wives and how they should be, is not fair. Men’s views on how a wife should behave has changed over the years. When this essay was published, every man saw a wife this way. She is the one who has to do everything the man says, and she has no opinion and no way out. Fortunately, this has all changed, and Brady wrote this to show how sexist society was and how their point of view on women was extremely incorrect.
• The definition of a wife that Brady gives his audience is not realistic, nor is it fair. It is not realistic because society does not see a wife this way anymore. Women are now treated as equally to men. In paragraph 3, Brady says, “I would like to go back to school so that I can become economically independent, support myself, and if need be, support those dependent upon me.” This states that the wife needs to support him while he goes to school, and he wants to go to school to support himself, and maybe his wife and his children, if he wants to. Brady, in paragraph 3, also says that “My wife must arrange to miss time at work and not lose her job. It may mean a small cut in my wife’s income from time to time, but I guess I can tolerate that. Needless to say, my wife will arrange and pay for the care of the children while my wife is working.” This quote emphasizes that the wife must put her job at risk, so her husband can go to school. The wife needs to also arrange and pay for the care of the children.
• This essay was written based on female roles in society. Women should not be the ones responsible for all of the cooking, cleaning, and child care. Men should also participate and help the wife with everything. In paragraph 4, Brady says, “I want a wife who will keep my house clean, a wife who will pick up after my children, a wife who will pick up after me.” This highlights that women are the ones who do the work around the house, while men just sit and watch. Brady wrote this essay for social and economic background because she wants society’s point of view on women to change. Society should not view women as servants to their husbands.
• This essay is very realistic, fair, and irrelevant to present times. It is realistic because when society saw women as unequal, they expected these responsibilities and behaviors from them. They expected wives to only care for their children and for the husband to take care of his physical needs and his social life. It is fair to men because they do not have to worry about cooking or cleaning. They do not have to worry about nurturing children or any of the other little arrangements that the women take care of. It benefits men for women to do all the work. This is not relevant to present times because society has grown and, thankfully, does not see women this way anymore.

Method and Structure

• Many men have different points of view on how women should be treated in their households. Some men, they are in a marriage because it benefits them in their personal ways, and they take their wife for granted. However, on the other hand, some men are in a marriage because they want to be because they appreciate their wife. Brady uses definition to achieve her purpose by using repetition of the words “I want a wife” in her essay. This shapes her ideas and highlights her thesis at the end of the passage.
• A wife has many responsibilities; she must cook and clean and prepare her children, and she must do the same for her husband, take care of his social life, his physical and emotional needs, and the finances, A wife is taken for granted. Really, a wife should be the other half of her husband and have the same responsibilities as a man, being able to work and maintain the household, as well as her husband.
• The introduction serves as a point of view for the audience to understand the way she feels and why she feels that way. It is classified into a group, specifically wives. Paragraph 1 shows this. Paragraph 2 confirms Brady’s definition because the wife must work and send the husband to school, and then needs to take care of his physical needs, then his social life, then his sexual needs. The question at the end of the introduction relates to the question at the end of the essay because the first question says, “Why do I want a wife?” Then throughout the essay, she demonstrates the qualities a wife is supposed to have and all the things a wife is supposed to do. At the end of the essay, she says, “Who wouldn’t want a wife?” The second question emphasizes all the things a wife must go through and all the things she must do, she takes care of everything, and the spouse does not have to worry about anything. A wife is often taken for granted.
• The author classifies the different things a wife must do to fulfill her husband’s needs, and she separates them into categories. Paragraph 4 is an example of a category because it says, “I want a wife who will keep my house clean. A wife who will keep my clothes clean, ironed, mended, and replaced.” This highlights the duties and responsibilities of a wife. Another example of a category is paragraph 7, “I want a wife who is sensitive to my sexual needs, a wife who makes love passionately and eagerly when I feel like it, a wife who makes sure that I am satisfied.” This emphasizes another duty a wife must fulfill to make her husband happy. Different classifications help develop the argument that women should not be looked upon like a servant to men. Women deserve more than how society and men view them.
• Brady uses a sarcastic tone throughout her essay to humorously exaggerate the wants and desires a husband dreams of from his wife. For example, in paragraph 3, Brady says, “I want a wife to keep track of the children’s doctor and dentist appointments. And to keep track of mine, too.” in paragraph 4, Brady says, “I want a wife who will keep my house clean.” Brady lists these things that a wife “should do” to indicate that saying “I want a wife”, is much more simplistic than actually being one.
• Brady repeats “I want a wife” in almost every sentence to make a point about female stereotypes and mocks men and society’s unrealistic expectations for women. This stylistic device conveys that the person who wants a wife does not want to worry about any little arrangements like doctor or dentist appointments for their children, and they do not want to deal with cooking and cleaning. They would rather have a wife to do that for them. Therefore Brady argues that women are treated unfairly in marriages, it is wrong, and women should not belong under the power of men. This fits in with Brady’s main idea and purpose because it shows the mistreatment and misconception of wives. Her purpose was to encourage action and stand up for themselves.
• Brady never substituted the personal pronoun “she” for “my wife” because Brady does not want a wife; she states that a wife needs to cook and clean and care for her husband and her children and that a wife needs to handle her husband’s physical, social, and financial arrangements; these things are her responsibility as a wife. In paragraph 3, Brady repeats “my wife” instead of replacing it with “she,” “Needless to say, and my wife will arrange and pay for the care of the children while my wife is working.” The effect of the repetition of the word “my wife” in the same sentences adds emphasis to the end. This changes the meaning of “my wife” from an independent person to the author’s object.
• Brady uses expressions such as “of course” and “needless to say” in paragraph 3 because these expressions illustrate the mocking tone that makes it obvious that the men, along with society, are motivated by self-interest by using the “obvious” factor of things. These modifiers sprinkle the essay with satirical edginess and contain underlying criticisms about men’s view on the common wife. It also highlights the duties that Brady believes should not be immediately expected of a wife.

I Want a Wife conveys that women should not be confined to traditional gender roles and must be granted equal rights and respect as men. The author contends that women are equally competent in handling household chores, but they deserve the opportunity to pursue a career and achieve their goals.

Judy Brady masterfully utilizes various rhetorical techniques in her essay “I Want a Wife”. Employing irony, sarcasm, and wit, she effectively communicates her message. Additionally, she skillfully incorporates hyperbole and understatement to emphasize her points. Through her direct and articulate writing style, she successfully conveys her message with clarity and precision.

Judy’s central argument in her essay is that the current education system is inadequate in preparing students for their future. According to her, the system is excessively focused on imparting knowledge rather than teaching students essential skills such as critical thinking and problem-solving. She firmly advocates for a reformation of the education system to better equip students for the challenges that await them.

Cite this page

I Want a Wife Judy Brady Analysis. (2019, Aug 05). Retrieved from https://papersowl.com/examples/i-want-a-wife-judy-brady-analysis/

"I Want a Wife Judy Brady Analysis." PapersOwl.com , 5 Aug 2019, https://papersowl.com/examples/i-want-a-wife-judy-brady-analysis/

PapersOwl.com. (2019). I Want a Wife Judy Brady Analysis . [Online]. Available at: https://papersowl.com/examples/i-want-a-wife-judy-brady-analysis/ [Accessed: 7 Nov. 2024]

"I Want a Wife Judy Brady Analysis." PapersOwl.com, Aug 05, 2019. Accessed November 7, 2024. https://papersowl.com/examples/i-want-a-wife-judy-brady-analysis/

"I Want a Wife Judy Brady Analysis," PapersOwl.com , 05-Aug-2019. [Online]. Available: https://papersowl.com/examples/i-want-a-wife-judy-brady-analysis/. [Accessed: 7-Nov-2024]

PapersOwl.com. (2019). I Want a Wife Judy Brady Analysis . [Online]. Available at: https://papersowl.com/examples/i-want-a-wife-judy-brady-analysis/ [Accessed: 7-Nov-2024]

Don't let plagiarism ruin your grade

Hire a writer to get a unique paper crafted to your needs.

Our writers will help you fix any mistakes and get an A+!

Please check your inbox.

You can order an original essay written according to your instructions.

Trusted by over 1 million students worldwide

1. Tell Us Your Requirements

2. Pick your perfect writer

3. Get Your Paper and Pay

Hi! I'm Amy, your personal assistant!

Don't know where to start? Give me your paper requirements and I connect you to an academic expert.

short deadlines

100% Plagiarism-Free

Certified writers

Home — Essay Samples — Literature — I Want a Wife — Analysis Of Rhetorical Devices Used In Judy Brady’s I Want A Wife

Analysis of Rhetorical Devices Used in Judy Brady’s I Want a Wife

• Categories: I Want a Wife

About this sample

Words: 1666 |

Published: Jun 7, 2021

Words: 1666 | Pages: 4 | 9 min read

Cite this Essay

To export a reference to this article please select a referencing style below:

Let us write you an essay from scratch

• 450+ experts on 30 subjects ready to help
• Custom essay delivered in as few as 3 hours

Get high-quality help

Prof. Kifaru

Verified writer

• Expert in: Literature

+ 120 experts online

By clicking “Check Writers’ Offers”, you agree to our terms of service and privacy policy . We’ll occasionally send you promo and account related email

No need to pay just yet!

Related Essays

2.5 pages / 1208 words

2.5 pages / 1035 words

3 pages / 1264 words

4 pages / 1799 words

Remember! This is just a sample.

You can get your custom paper by one of our expert writers.

121 writers online

Still can’t find what you need?

Browse our vast selection of original essay samples, each expertly formatted and styled

Related Essays on I Want a Wife

Judy Brady wrote her essay, "I Want a Wife," as a description of the "modern" 1972 wife and what's expected of her. The question is, though, does it hold up today? It is my belief that, though some of the descriptions still [...]

“Why I Want A Wife” comes from a short essay by Judy Brady, presents a person who would want to marry another woman for a wife. Judy Brady thinks about having a wife after she has a male friend who had a recent divorce and start [...]

In her essay, “I Want a Wife,” Judy Brady explores society’s expectations on women’s roles in a marital household during the early 1970s. Using rhetoric, she strategically places a rather impactful, new viewpoint into the minds [...]

As the quote by Wyland says, “The ocean stirs the heart, inspires the imagination and brings eternal joy to the soul.” I found this quote and took it into a different direction. This was by viewing women as the “ocean” and the [...]

War, deeply intertwined with human existence, overshadows action with impasse and ideals with sterility. Although war results in the facade of victory for one side, no true winner exists, because under this triumphant semblance [...]

“These are but the spirit of things that have been.” The metaphorical words of the Ghost of Christmas Past are typical of Dickens’ melodramatic writing style. Set in Victorian England, a time rife with greed and social [...]

Related Topics

By clicking “Send”, you agree to our Terms of service and Privacy statement . We will occasionally send you account related emails.

Where do you want us to send this sample?

By clicking “Continue”, you agree to our terms of service and privacy policy.

Be careful. This essay is not unique

This essay was donated by a student and is likely to have been used and submitted before

Download this Sample

Free samples may contain mistakes and not unique parts

Sorry, we could not paraphrase this essay. Our professional writers can rewrite it and get you a unique paper.

Please check your inbox.

We can write you a custom essay that will follow your exact instructions and meet the deadlines. Let's fix your grades together!

Get Your Personalized Essay in 3 Hours or Less!

We use cookies to personalyze your web-site experience. By continuing we’ll assume you board with our cookie policy .

• Instructions Followed To The Letter
• Deadlines Met At Every Stage
• Unique And Plagiarism Free